Horror Film Director

RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM THE ROAD


Posted on April 26th, by Darren Lynn Bousman in blog, general, inspiration, news, Rambling, Rants and Ramblings, THE DEVIL'S CARNIVAL. 41 comments

THE DEVIL’S CARNIVAL ROAD TOUR

I am writing this blog from the back of a van… a van that has thus far traveled 7,000 miles in the last few weeks.

A van that smells of tears and sadness.  Tears, sadness, and corn nuts… let us not forget the corn nuts…

I am not sure what state we are in… It’s snowing outside, and it’s cold.  I am guessing we are in one of the Virginias, but that is just a guess…

The reality is, most days I don’t know where we are.    I am borderline delirious.  My diet has been replaced with a steady intake of Pop-Tarts, chocolate milk, Cracker Barrel and Nerds candy…

My insides hurt… Terrance is sitting behind me eating a sandwich we picked up from a gas station…

Nothing is sadder than hearing a grown man cry, and I am pretty sure I hear weeping as he devours yet another meal with no nutritional value…

By the end of this tour GraveRobber will transform into GraveBlobber… I kid, I kid… He’s already there.

We are on day 20, though it feels like day 200. We are not even half way done yet…  I am not sure my body can handle one more hour, let alone one more month…

What am I doing?  I am a fucking director…

This isn’t directing… This is an endurance test on how much truck stop food one man can endure before suffering a heart attack…

It wasn’t suppose to be like this…

Let’s rewind…

There has not been a moment in the last few months that I have not woken up in a cold sweat.  The stress and anxiety that has over taken my day to day existence has probably taken at least 15 years off of my life.

I AM A SADO-MASOCHIST

I look back on the shit I have done to myself and I am in awe at my stupidity.   Did I really just say that?   Did I really just do what I think I did.  I watch myself doing ignorant and insane things and find myself powerless to stop.

Self destruction at it’s finest.

What ever possessed me to think I could self distribute my own movie might have been the biggest jack ass thing I have done to date.   What in Lucifer’s name was I thinking?  Who did I think I was?

I guess part of me did it out of spite.  Spite from being burned on my last few releases getting dumped into obscurity.   Part of me did it out of rage.  Rage towards a system that didn’t get, comprehend, or care about these strange, weird, and at times self indulgent films I was making.

Or maybe it was I was just pissed at myself for being unable to live up to the bar I set for myself while on the Saw films.

But, what if these critics were right?   What if I was a hack?   Some chump who got lucky and road the coattails of a brand… Whatever the reason, when I heard myself utter the words “fuck it, let’s put this out ourselves”. I thought it was a good idea

   

The days and weeks that followed were the most horrific and depressing of my life.  I had once again done what I am becoming known for, speaking without thinking…  Jumping off a cliff without checking the parachute.

Within hours of declaring we would self distribute The Devil’s Carnival we made tickets available online.    We signed contracts with venues.  We sent deposits out to theaters.    We filed for city permits, we hired opening acts.   Almost instantly we had fired the shot that would start a war, and there was NO turning back.

I have always acted impulsively.  I am not one to stop and consider the repercussions of my actions.   In part, I think that is why I have had a modicum of success.   I don’t second guess myself.   I follow my instincts.  Do now, apologize later, and NEVER ask permission.

  

I AM IN OVER MY HEAD

In a few days time the backlash of what we were trying to pull off became fully realized.

No magical elves were going to suddenly appear and take care of the mountains of paperwork I had just slung upon us.

Insurance certificates…
Sellers permits…
E and O policies…
Rentals of PA systems
Lighting equipment
Buying of Merch
The list goes on and on.

And then I needed to hire a team of people.  I couldn’t pull this all off with just TZ, Spooky and I.  I needed to hire a driver, a Merch person, an accountant, roadies.

We were setting up mini concerts every single night, literal live shows with various musicians, burlesque performers, and freak shows…  AND we were about to live out of a van.

Who the fuck did I think I was?  I still have no idea what the hell I am doing as a filmmaker let along a distributor or promoter.

I AM TERRIFIED

When the weight and the scope of the project became apparent it was too late to back track.  As much as I wanted to reverse robot myself out of the hole I dug, this was moving faster than me.  I had started this, but I did not have the power to end this.

We had just booked ourselves in over 40 venues.  Most of them over 500 seats, some over 1,500 seats.

We were literally packing up a van and heading off into the great unknown for almost 2 months.

What if no one showed up?

What if they didn’t connect to the material?

What if they hated the movie?

What if the critics all tore me a new asshole?

What if…

Trying to explain my career choices to anyone in my life proves to be an impossibility.

My decisions seem flawed to the outside world.  You can only hear you are crazy so many times before you begin to question your own sanity.

And to the majority of Hollywood I am crazy… or maybe I am just a joke.   To the lions share of my friends I am certifiable.   At these times of self reflection I realize just how selfish I must sound.

“Hey Laura, you know that money we saved on my last movie?  Yeah, well I just put all of that in my next movie!”

“Hey Mr. Agent, please let everyone who might want to hire me know that I am gone for next three months shooting this short film. Then touring it around.  Oh, by the way, I am not making any money on this, thus you get no commission.”

“Hey Chance Dawg, sorry baby girl, daddy can’t walk you for the next 60 days. He is going to be living out of a smelly dirty van”

When we pulled away from Los Angeles, none of us knew what we were getting into…  This whole thing could end up a terrible disaster… The theaters could be empty… The events themselves could implode with technical malfunctions…

We all jumped in with blind faith, faith that the REPO! community still existed…  And if they still existed, they would show up?

As a team, we dove head first into something, having no clue of the outcome.

I AM A FAILURE…

I am a failure… In my life, I have failed more than I have succeeded…  People only hear about the success… The Saw’s… The Repo’s…

No one really talks about the failures, the countless projects I have been attached to that have died horrible deaths. Projects that have let me go… or asked me nicely, and not so nicely, to never return.

Fear is a hell of a thing. It stops people from seeing things clearly… Being scared is like having a fine film over your eyesight… it’s milky… distorted… and at times, irrational.

Sadly, most people live their life with fear being a major component of their decision making.

We are so scared of making the wrong choices, we rarely make the right ones.

I am scared of a lot of things…

One thing however I am not scared of is failing… I embrace it… I welcome it…  I think that is what separates me from my friends who have yet to make it… I am no better than them… In fact, in most cases they are much more talented than myself.  The only thing separating me from them is I am willing to put myself out there… I am willing to fail… Willing to look like an idiot… Willing to jump off the ledge without checking the parachute.

As we drove into the great unknown however I began to question my resolve… I don’t know how I would deal with this tour not working…

It only took two stops on our road tour journey to realize that would not be an issue…

SHOW IT, and they will come.

 

Fear stops people from doing a lot of things… In the case of me, it almost stopped me from embarking on this journey… Self distributing this thing….

I AM HUMBLED

This blog is being written exactly half way through the tour…  And while I have written almost 5 pages, I am not sure I know the right words to capture what I am feeling…

   

We have done something here.  Something that is working.  Something that now drives me, and defines me.   Not only as a filmmaker, but as a person…

I try to tell my friends, my colleges, my family… But I end up always sounding like a babbling idiot.   Unless you are experiencing this, there is no way in words I can accurately explain it to you…

I get so much shit on a daily basis about my faulty decision making, that for a long while, I began to think I was wrong…

This is not commercial…

This is not mainstream…

There is no audience for this…

You are wasting your time…

I get that I am weird… I get I piss people off… But they are not seeing what I am seeing…

Most filmmakers will work their entire life  and never realize how their work has effected others.

A director could make 20 films, make billions at the box office, and before his retirement all he has to show is his mansion, his millions in the bank account, and some great posters hanging around his office of movies he was apart of.    Let me be the first to say, nothing would make me happier then when I die, I have the mansion, the millions in the bank and some great posters.  But I want something more… Need something more.  I want to know I made a difference… I need to know my films have made a difference…

These fans… this audience are here NOT because of a billboard ad, or a TV spot.  They are here because they too are carnies – and they bask in the strangeness of what we do… they crave something different, because they too are different.

An artists job is to create and hopefully inspire.   However, once in awhile, it is the audience who creates…  Whom take this ‘thing’ and shape it… make it their own… No longer is this piece of art, this film, yours… It’s theirs.

They no are no longer just fans… They are the artists.

 

 

The majority of people who know me, have no idea what this really is, or why I am continually out championing behind these small out of the box projects.

This tour,  this whole experience is a drug.  And I can 100% with conviction tell you, as a filmmaker and artist, I am addicted…  It fuels me… it keeps me wanting to fight.  I am Popeye, and this is my spinach.

Gone are the days that we have to accept the fate handed down to us…

If I can get into a van with 6 of my friends, and create what we have created, than so can anybody else…

 

Gone are the days where I bitch about lack of support, or ‘the man’.   There is no man… There is only ME standing in front of MYSELF…

The only thing stopping people from seeing my films is ME…

   

I will never be complacent again… I will never just ‘accept’ my fate… If need be, I will make this  van my home…  Punk Rock Filmmaking!

While my pants size has grown in the last 20 days, so has my understanding of filmmaking and sacrifice.

Being a director is more than calling out the shots… It’s about exposing your art to the masses, no matter what the costs… It means putting your work in front of your comfort.  It’s about connecting with your audience, and finding them.

Filmmaking is about getting in a dirty van, and driving across North America, and not stopping until your art has reached the masses..

I have found my audience… And they have found this…

For the last 20 minutes I have been scouring through my pictures to find that gem to end the blog with…  I have decided on the one below.  It’s not one of cool costumes, or packed theaters, or the nightly insanity… It’s something much simple and fitting when trying to encompass all that is happening in one image…

This didn’t happen because we willed it… Or because we crossed our fingers and hoped for the best… This came to be what it is because a bunch of people… artists… friends… got together and decided to change the fate of our project.  We refused to just accept, so we went out and created our own fate…

I am tired, worn out, and borderline delirious… And let me tell you this my dear readers… It’s a glorious feeling…

dlb

BUY TICKETS FOR THE ROAD TOUR





  • kayla

    Stop in Yakima. I’ll make you a real meal.

  • http://www.darrenlynnbousman.com darren

    Awesome

  • Jennifer

    I just want to say thank you. Thank you for doing this. For showing that punk rock filmmaking is possible. For adding to the freak (or Goth, Punk, anyone not “normal”) culture and giving us great art.
    It’s hard not being one of the masses, when even art and entertainment is reinforcing that you’re different, and if you don’t like it, just change, try to fit in better. Pretend harder and agree that the new summer blockbusters are wonderful and not terrible and boring.

  • https://www.facebook.com/paradoxfriendly Lauren Watson

    Reading this made my heart ache in a good way. Thanks for all your hard work and endurance, Darren and team. We love what you do and you inspire us to press for expression of our own passions despite adversity. Long live the punk rock film maker!

    Excited to see you all in Portland,
    Lauren

  • Jennifer

    Aaaand I hit submit on accident. My bad. Just to finish up what I was saying – thank you for giving us this. For helping to alter the “real world” just a bit, to make it more of a home to us. Thank you.

  • Patrick

    It was a wonderful experience. One does not regularly get a chance to meet filmmakers. Musicians can always be caught on tour, but you Hollywood types keep yourselves sequestered in movieland. That was a joke. Thank you for sharing your art and visions with us.

  • Sharon

    Let me say that I am thankful that you did not give up on your dream. As such we did not fail to help you realize it. I am beyond words on how much of an inspiration you and the crew of Devils Carnival are. I was amazed at the vivid sets and the music was beyond reproach. I can only hope you will release it on dvd soon so that my daughters might enjoy it also. I hope you continue to have safe and inspiring journeys through this lovely country. Always a fan.

  • Matteo

    You truly inspire me sir. Expect to see me in Vegas.

  • Miss Chelsea

    This has been an amazing ride and an absolute artistic orgasm for all of your fans, for anyone that’s gotten within a foot of this project. This experience totally fucks with and changes you for all sorts of the better.

    You are a kind, generous, kickass, tenacious, brilliant, sassy don’t take shit mothafucka, and you deserve all the success this is bringing.

    See you in Kansas City! :D

    With love <3,
    Chelsea (and jafo!)

  • Trevor

    Words cannot adequately convey the depth of my respect and admiration for you. What you and Terrance and Dan have done is beyond incredible. Your art is so unique and unconventional that its mainstream rejection would send any but a man of the greatest character cowering in a corner. Yet your perseverance and faith in your adoring fans is nothing less than a triumph of the human spirit. Thank you Darren for creating such beauty at great personal risk, and thank you for enduring the tribulations of sharing it with the world. Because of your outstanding conviction and sacrifices I am proud to call myself a carny.

  • jason

    I’ve been in a horrible funk for over a week now…which really sucks because I’m supposed to be a freelance writer…after reading this, the clouds have lifted. Your words and dedication to your art have helped me get back on my horse. This was beautiful and I wish nothing but the best for you and your team. Thank you sir.

  • Katie

    I saw you in Pittsburgh on Tuesday night, and all I can say is you all have a true gift that needs to be shared with the world. You are genuinely nice people who are extremely talented, and even though, I’m sure, doing this will have it’s downs, I can assure you that you are making an impact with the world. Personally, you all gave me something to look forward to with the Saw films and Repo! during a time of my life that I would never, EVER live through again. The Saw films kept me on the edge of my seat, especially the second one, and Repo! helped me express my grief with the song “I didn’t know I’d love you so much” after my Dad passed. TDC was just as amazing, and I cannot wait to see what you all bring us next!

    Be safe, and remember you are making a difference in the world with your gifts. Thank you.
    ~Katie

  • http://www.opinionsofamadman.info Matthew Herch

    Mr. Bousman, I am an artist/writer as well. I have been writing since I was a young boy, designing 3D artwork since 16 and working as a manager of a pizza place since 19. I have lost interest in writing over the past few years, and my interest in art has dwindled to near non-existence.

    You have changed me. Repo gave me hope in the flip-side of american culture. It gave me hope in the people who see outside the box. I longed the count myself as one of them. I wanted so badly to start working on my various projects, but I always allowed my fear of failure to get the best of me.

    When I first heard of “The Devil’s Carnival.” I was ecstatic. Too much time had passed since Repo; I had nearly forgotten about that culture that I had longed to be a part of. I knew that “The Devil’s Carnival” was going to be the straw that broke the camels back (sorry for the cliche.)

    Your last few blog posts, this one included, have given me so much inspiration. I’ve started working in 3D animation again. I’ve picked up a novella that I wrote in what seems like ages ago. I really need to go back and revise it, but you have given me the strength and will to do it.

    I must say that upon reading the first few paragraphs of this latest blog post, I was sincerely scared that you were going to quit. My heart was in my throat when I read that you were exhausted and that your faith in the project had been shaken. It was only upon completion that I realized that the show will still go on. That is what inspired me to write today. It’s also what inspired me to finally get my car fixed so I could go to the show in Toledo. I’ve bought 3 tickets for my friends and I.

    I’ve thought for years that Hollywood is getting diluted with stale plots, too much CG, and the pestilence that are 3D movies. It’s about damn time that someone give them the finger.

    Mr. Bousman, you and Terrance are my heroes. You have taught me that life is nothing without having the courage to risk it all. I’ll see you at the show!

  • Rebecca

    Youbare an inspiration to all of us, Carnies, Plague Rats, all of us. You are our God. We will follow your work to the end of the world and back. Your passion to share this with us is so beautiful. I’m glad none of this is mainstream. I like it when people ask me “what is this? What are you talking about?” and when I tell them or try to explain, they are left in confusion cause they have no idea. But then again, it has also connected me further with other friends and we can share our likes about your art. It’s a wonderful thing all of you are sacrificing for us. I’m proud to be a Carnie (alongside being a Plague Rat). We are all united as one because of you.

  • David Rose

    Hey Darren, I don’t give a shit what anyone thinks… The movie was great and I can’t wait to see the rest of the installments I will be there front row like I was in Richmond, like you wrote on my CD at the table with Emilie and Terrance “hail Satan” still gives me a smile everytime I look at it, I will cherish that day and night and remember the excitement I felt meeting you all and how I still would love to be in one of your movies one day, shir even if it’s just a short scene on me being killed would be amazing just like your movies to date, keep up the amazing work no matter what those critic douche nozzles have to say… Hit me up if your ever in the VA area. I still say your awesome no matter what

  • Stefanie D.

    All I can say is that after reading your blog, I am truly inspired and awed by you and the Repo team. There was no sugar coating anything or making this whole tour sound glamorous when it really wasn’t. All there was, was the truth. As a Repo and now Devil’s Carnival fan, I respect all of you as artists and hope you continue to create more incredible works of art. Testify!

  • Kelly

    Darren, not only are you a great man, you’re a great artist. Reading this made me realize that you’ve got a gift with words, both writing and bringing them to life on the screen, that most people only wish they had.

    I was at the Charlotte road show; I know for a fact how colossal this enterprise is, how hard you all are working to put it together, and you don’t hear these two words enough: THANK YOU. Thank you for believing in yourself. Thank you for believing in the project. Most of all? Thank you for believing in us. Even when you were worried that we might not show, you forged ahead and had faith in us that we would come to you, and we did. We always will. Thank you so much.

    • http://facebook.com/runrunbunnyrun Britty Kitty

      This blog struck my empathy nerve so hard that I’ve waited a little more than 10 hours to respond, though I knew I wanted to say thank you in some way. Your courage is just phenomonal. As an artist you place a piece of yourself in whatever it is you manifest, and in doing so you expose yourself to your audience in a raw form. And that takes more bravery than almost anything else in life.

      You’re all so friendly and kind, so open and inviting, and you’re all so amazing. I’m thoroughly glad that your exposure paid off, that you’ve gained a tremendous following. And we all thank you for what you’ve done, what you’ve given up to grow this carnival.

      If you’re ever back in Baltimore and need anything, my family was the group with the little boy, and we’d do anything to help you, all of you. You’ve inspired all of us and captured our hearts in your creation once more, and it’d be the least we could do besides showing up.

      Thank you again.

  • Brian

    There are a lot of us out here sick to death of the same old recycled plot lines and characters that hollywood seems so in love with these days. If you make it we will come. This project has been running purely on your (and Terrance’s) strength of will and it has been a herculean task. My hat is off to you and your team of mad carnies. I was at the San Diego show and it is an experience I will carry with me for the rest of my life. You made that happen. Be proud! not many directors can make an indelible mark like that.

  • Amber

    I absolutely love your work :) Are you planning to hit New Zealand at all? I definitely don’t want to miss the show if you are.

  • http://about.me/astartiel Genny Hempstead

    Wonderfully written blog. You even had me near tears at one point, really. So glad the tour is going so well! ;) Glad you are out there making your fate happen! Never believe the critics, it’s only their opinion…

    One piece of advice though: Organic food stores & sections of stores are quite common these days. Get a cooler for the van & fill it with healthy food for the road to help balance out all the crap you can find at gas stations & road-side restaurants.

    Still hoping to get to SLC to see TDC. Denver is the same day as the last day of the Black Hills Film Festival & I might be busy trying out for a film Sean Covel plans to film near Hill City, SD this summer… ;-) Now, you three (TZ, Sean & you) making a movie together might be interesting!

  • Alex

    When I read the first few paragraphs of this post I was absolutely terrified. I have spent all my life living in the bible belt and I have been criticized incessantly for not following the beaten path. I was shamed for my love of writing and told that I was impractical. What you have done with The Devil’s Carnival gives me hope and renews my faith in being different. I am proud to have been able to spread the word by bringing 2 of my friends with me and getting 5 others to come of their own volition. When you came to Houston you gave my friends and I hope. We will follow you to the ends of the earth and will support you in everything you do. I hope you never have to lose hope again. There are people all over the world talking about your movies and supporting you as best they can. Us carnies have to stick together y’know? :D Thank you again for everything you have done. It means more than you know.

  • Jessica Richardson

    I just want to say thank you for all that you have done. My kids and I were at the Dallas show and it is the greatest thing in the world to share an experience such as this with like-minded “freaks” as we are often labeled. You and Terrance have our support in whatever you do and although we may not contribute much to the riches, I truly hope you can feel our appreciation.
    We will show up for whatever you have in store for the future. Much love to you all and don’t ever stop.

  • Che

    I look at the pictures you post on this blog, on the facebook page and that Terrance posts on his and I see that while it might not hit a big blockbuster’s ticket sales the film you and your friends are touring in that dirty, cramped van is a success. The wealth you and your friends earn are the fans who drive sometimes hours to see it again and again. The fans who buy your merchandise knowing it’s a way they can become a part of the journey this film takes.
    My memory from the 4/20 show that I keep flashing to is the amount of people braving the rain in their face paint, corsets and eyeliner to see this film, meet the minds behind it and share your (and Terrance’s) crazy, amazingly fun carnival.
    It takes a lot of courage to take on something that others can’t or won’t see the potential waiting for the right moment to burst forth. That moment when you stepped off the ledge into the vast chasm without a safety net shows your courage and resolve. The fans responded by thronging to the screenings.
    thank you sir for an experience I will remember for a very long time, as well as putting your neck out to give us something of yourself as well.

  • Shae

    I can’t wait. You guys are my heroes and you’re better than any rock star I’ve ever met. ;) You guys bleed for your art and that is AMAZING. Can’t wait to see you in Chicago!! Safe travels! Maybe we can get you some good food. :D

  • http://www.facebook.com/saidaraks sa’ida

    We of T3 (Time Travel Tourists, Hampton Roads VA) Salute You!! Your Diverse Great Efforts are an inspiration. The Tour is Awesome and I personally can’t wait to see what’s next. Coming from Los Angeles CA and having lived in Seattle WA, Norfolk VA is sadly lacking in many creative elements. I know how much road tours can suck. Living out of a van sucks. Eating fast food all the time sucks…… BUT bringing your show to people who might not otherwise be able to get to an event like that is an AMAZING Thing.

  • Guilty Susie

    Just want to say that I have been to three of your shows.. (VA and NY) and you all have continuously gone the “extra mile” during this tour. Even in NYC where the first event overlapped the second… you and TZ both came to speak to us in line to make sure we understood the circumstances and were contented to wait just a few minutes longer. Little things like this we appreciate the most even though none of us mind a bit. Was looking at the tour poster… I knew your schedule is INSANE, like a masochistic rock band you put on a show once or twice an evening. I don’t know how you do it…even moreso with all that beer in your systems…

  • http://twitter.com/LizRose137 lizrose13

    You guys are a true inspiration to all us budding young artists out there who think there is no one interrested in what we do and should just buckle down and get real jobs, real lives or just live like ‘normal people’… fuck that. The movie is great, so no worries there! Seeing what the Carnival is doing and how you talk about it as a labor of love and as something that YOU! wanted to do- everyone else be damned- is really awsome. I love it in all seriousness and hearing the story behind it’s creation gives me hope that I can create something great with my art as well so long as I follow my heart and push out all the nay-sayers. You said it yourself, the only one holding us back is ourselves. And you’re living proof that strange, awsome, off-the-beaten-path, crazy, punk rock film making can work and there IS! an audience. Keep it up! And hang in there, you’re doing amazing, all of you! Try to find something healthy to eat once in a while and expect to see this bellydancer again in Vegas! Take care sweethearts!

  • Laura

    I honestly see this as inspiration for any one in the world.
    Well done Mr Bousman you officially made me cry
    I feel weird putting that but it’s the truth… Thank you

  • Gail

    I read a quote from Bowie yesterday that immediately made me think of you guys. He was talking about the fact that early in in his career he would get booed frequently during gigs. He said “I seemed to play a lot of the wrong gigs, for the wrong crowds. It got better when I made my own crowd.”
    One of the most iconic figures in the history of rock was told he had no audience, and set out to do almost exactly what you guys are doing. (And you have the advantage of the Internet!) You are doing a great thing, and an important thing – thanks for all the hard work! Your crowd adores you.

  • http://www.lightanddark.net Glen Baisley

    As an indie filmmaker I know all too well how hard it is to fight to get your stuff seen. I think your road tour idea is nothing short of brilliant! I really enjoyed your show and wish you all the best.

  • Sam

    I love you and everything you choose to be. And judging from all the awesome comments on here, a lot of others love you, too. Never, ever give up your dreams. A lot of us would be lost without you. Thank you for giving us these wonderful gifts. You are the best.

  • http://bxxweb.com Daniel Knauf

    Gonna be a renaissance, man. Nice to be working outside the wire, huh? Get in touch with me. We can share notes, carny-to-carny.

    Daniel Knauf
    Creator, Carnivale

  • Draith

    Seeing this film in Baltimore was an experience that will stay with me til my dying day, good sir. It is up there with the first (and only) shadowcast I saw of Repo! at the same venue I got to meet TZ… Actually, it’s better.

    It’s better because there was such a personal-connection aspect to the event. There was an energy, an electric feeling even waiting in line outside Charles Theater (while painting my girlfriend’s face as she painted mine, after a 3hr drive). It was more than apparent that this was something special, something you can’t just GET anywhere. Fuck mainstream. Mainstream is for suits-and-ties and pop stars and politicians who don’t know jack-shit about what creates a subculture. Let the haters hate; they will never understand. From our view, you are a visionary and an artist… creating something no corporation could.

    Thank you. Thank you for sharing your vision, thank you for putting yourself out there amidst the falls and the fails and the haters and the misunderstandings.

    Thank you for Devil’s Carnival.

  • Robert Dixon

    well well well since you are stopping in Sacramento for the last show does that make us hell? For hell you stated was the last stop so it must be true but that is fine due to a devils assistant already here before Lucifer. hahahaha well ill leave that to you and Terrance to figure out when you arrive also since the Sacramento shadow casts grave robber will also be attending me and him were wondering where you would like to goto for the after part maybe pizza at Luigis or something?

  • Chelsea C.

    Thank you for writing this. I feel like its something I needed to read. Fear is something that is always in my way and bringing me down. So for me, when I read this.. It just really hit. You can do whatever you want as long as you don’t stop yourself from doing it! I love it. Very inspirational. Very motivational. Thank you so much for the awesome movie. Can’t wait to meet everyone again in Kansas city! <3

  • admin

    Stellar posting Darren. Enjoy the journey.

    – Will

  • Carly

    Diving head first into this is the only way to do these types of things, if you want to get the full experience anyway. I hope to do this one day with my own art/film and I can only imagine the amount of fear and pride it will fill me with- the kind that you’re experiencing right now. I truly admire TDC, Repo and all of your other under dog works. We need to have more directors, more people, more artists such as you and your crew. We support you all the way.

  • Andrea

    Very few people can say they are doing what they love. But you and Terrance can. And fans are responding. In the end, it’s all worth it. Remember that above all else.

  • http://jessbdesignsthings.blogspot.ca JessB

    This, all of this, the blog, the tour, your perseverance, are a massive inspiration. Just knowing that things like this are being done, that if you put yourself out there with enough force and passion behind what you do, you can move mountains.
    Thank you so much for everything you’ve done.
    I’ve been waiting for this before it was even a twinkle in your eye.

  • Antoine Randolph

    I have seen The devils carnival. I cannot wait for part 2 Hopefully you will do the live tour and come back to Pittsburgh P.A. I will be looking forward to it.